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Self-Esteem in Children



Self-esteem can create a positive mental attitude which cultivates confidence and serves as a cushion to a child especially when a child is faced with a stressful situation. To improve the self-esteem of a child parents and teachers need to implement a few changes. Below are some of the changes that can be adapted for the sanity of your child.



It is very natural for parents to compare their children. This brings about a tendency for a child to become insecure of the capabilities that they possess.

Instead of comparing them it would be better to give them credit for their uniqueness. Appreciate what they are good at as this attitude can become a game changer.




Failure can be disappointing but it's not the end of the world. As unpleasant as it can be, children don't feel comfortable when they fail.  It makes them want to change their approach and make wise decisions to become more efficient. Allowing your child to fail can teach them the consequences of their inconsistencies and will dare them to become more serious about their responsibilities.



It is very common to hear parents talking about what they had wished to become but for some reason they were not able to achieve their goal.

Often all these bottled-up feelings boil down to having their child fulfil their dream job.

Please remember that if you happen to force your child into doing something that you had been passionate about, it would not be justified, and this can lead to having a miserable life.

So instead of imposing your dream job on your child just let your child be and choose what they are comfortable in doing.



Negative self-talk sets in when a child is constantly bullied or could be struggling academically. These challenges result in a child believing that there is something wrong with them as they indulge in thinking that they are unworthy.

On the other hand if a child is encouraged by their parent or teacher to instead of focusing on their strengths rather than their failures they should focus on their strengths this challenges them to learn to take the right steps forward in the right direction.

Positive self-talk benefits a child to become courageous in setting positive goals. The child feels determined to develop a positive attitude towards life. It initiates a bounce back ability.



Creating awareness tools such as self-help books or movies or even motivational mentoring can help a child overcome negative self-talk.

The truth of the matter is that there will be good days and there will be bad days too so remind them gently to practice the habit of self-talk to boost their much needed self-esteem.



Parents and teachers should engage in healthy conversations with a child. This is a responsibility that should not be taken very lightly.

Unhurried conversations with a child can create trust and strong bonds and this in turn gives the child courage to openly share the good and bad experiences without the fear of being mocked or ridiculed.



 Some of the best memories do not need elaborate holiday plans. Involving the children in baking or cooking on a cold rainy day or involving them in gardening their favorite plant for example gives them the sense of duty of being responsible. As they learn to nurture things and take their responsibilities more seriously this also helps them build their confidence too.



As a rule of the thumb remember to teach children to be thankful no matter whatever the circumstances. You might wonder how this can raise their self-esteem? Well, this allows a child to realise that nothing is promised in life, and it prompts them to be grateful to everything that is good in their world.



Teachers must abolish harsh criticism. The choice of words can easily demotivate a child and can cause shame which then springs to hatred and at times this can also lead to an onset of depression.

Instead of humiliating them, be gentle and make them aware about their weakness and guide them through making better choices so that they can excel.

Counselling a child can benefit the parent, teachers, and the child from detecting the root cause of a problem and coming up with solutions to solve the dilemma.


Let us remind ourselves that today's children are our tomorrow's leaders and if we can't be gentle towards them then we surely do not want to be part of building a catastrophic nation.

By Disha Sharma

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