Chit Chat With . . .
A wonderful soul sister who is healer, a teacher, a tarot reader, a medium, a strong and selfless empowered woman who has an abundance of knowledge, there is never a dull moment in her company, it is an enlightening experience. She is all about self-love, self-care and brings about self awareness in others. A superwoman who does not need a cape to be a super hero. This month our Chit Chat is with Denise Jones, who talks about who she is, self-love, affirmations, her morning routine, and winding down.
Tell us a bit about yourself, who is Denise Jones?
I am a holistic therapist who has one foot in the clouds and the other foot firmly planted on the earth. I am qualified in multiple therapies and practice what I preach. I love to meditate read and laugh and joke with my friends. My family are important to me and I love to spend quality time with them.
What does happiness mean to you?
Happiness for me is a daily feeling. I refuse to settle for anything less now. It wasn’t always like this way though. It has taken years to get to this point. For me personally, Happiness comes from the feeling of being calm and content. The freedom that comes from feeling secure and balanced. Knowing my worth and being always in control of my life. I fully understand now that I am the captain of my ship. That knowledge brings me happiness and contentment. Knowing I have the power to change anything in my life I am not happy with! Wow what a game changer that was for me. When I realised that I could be my own superhero. Even If I couldn’t change events, I could choose how I reacted to things.
I take happiness from many thing in life but one simple example of happiness to me is this: You know that big deep breath you take? The one that creates that blissful moment of peace for that spilt second. There is no mind chatter, no expectations or stress. In that moment there is nothing just you, your breath and calmness. To me that is happiness. I call it my bliss.
What inspires you?
I can get inspiration from many different things. People are my biggest inspirations. I am inspired by anyone who doesn’t quit. People who stand up for others in the world, if for any reason they cannot do it themselves at that time. People who are not afraid to say it how it is. People who do not accept their fate and strive to change their life. Anyone who is trying to be a better person inspires me. People who help other people with no expectation in return. Anyone who is brave enough to be themself and be true to themselves. In a world where everyone is trying to get you to be the same as them, that’s inspiring to me. Anyone who is a warrior inspires me.
What gives you the energy?
Food. Lol. Only joking, although a good diet and healthy sleeping pattern is vital for energy. I get energy and upliftment from other people’s laughter and joy. There is something powerful being in a circle of people and you are all connected in that moment, enjoying each other’s company. I get energy from music and the feelings that it creates. I get energy from the woods and the ocean. I love being connected with the earth and am often in awe of how magnificent life is. I feel very lucky to be here and be able to experience life. If am extremely tired and need a quick blast of energy I also ask my guides. They give me extra energy to keep me awake. Spirit Guides are wonderful and often are my go-to for most things.
How do you cope with external influences on self-love?
I don’t really have any external influences anymore. I am very confident in my beliefs and do not listen to any negative opinions anymore.
How can one simplify life and choose what is important?
We all have obligations that we must fill. There are some things that we can not get away with if we want to live a life. I: E work being one of those obligations.
It all comes down to choices and that the feeling that we have control over our life. In my opinion this is key to self-love and self-worth.
You ask yourself two questions
- Am I happy with that/ this? If you are, great carry one. If the answer is no
- What can I do about this? The answer is how you take back control. We always have a choice. There is something we can do, even if it’s just gaining choosing our emotional response or reaction to that situation. This is not because you are “a control freak” it’s about feeling like you matter. That your needs & feelings are important.
Based upon your response to Question 2. You may find yourself taking action in the form of changing jobs or changing your routine up, so you can fit in what you want.
It is the act of doing something that’s important here. As a side note I would just like to add the importance of not blaming someone else for the situation. They may be part of the problem, but they are not the sole owners are the outcome. As soon as blame someone else, you give away your power. You are saying that you do not matter. Only you can change your life. If you have not made changes that is on you no one else. I am coming from a place of love when I say that. I truly want the best for you and want you to want it to.
What is your top mindful technique you would recommend for self-love?
Positive affirmations are a surprising but brilliantly simple tool to use for self-love. Affirmations are widely used and accepted in the spiritual community already for attracting abundance, but they have missed a trick here really, I think. If you have self-love, self-worth, self-belief e.t.c you will manifest that new car, new job, dream home or money much much quicker.
When you have self-love, you know your worth and believe you deserve everything your heart desires. Affirmations help you focus your awareness on getting where to want to be, rather then where you currently are. Therefore, they are great for helping with self-love. They can help you take off your masks and see the beautiful and magnificent soul you are. There is truly no one else like you and for that, you should love and celebrate you in all your glory on daily basis.
Affirmations said to yourself in the mirror each morning can be life changing. They really help you with self-acceptance and self-worth. Your subconscious does not know the difference between a truth and a lie. It just accepts what it is told.
Start by saying hello good morning to yourself in the mirror each morning. If your feeling brave try hello, good morning beautiful / handsome. Smile to yourself. How many times have we brushed our teeth and not even acknowledge our self. Yet we expect other to acknowledge us? Each day expand a little more and add to your list. If you get really stuck there are some great affirmations you can listen to on u tube for inspiration.
Many people find it difficult to live their dream life, what advice can you give them?
Be kind to yourself. Remember you are doing the best that you can, with the knowledge that you currently have. When you know better, you can do better. Take it one step, one day at a time. It is not a race. Everything starts from within, so in the beginning focus on how you feel and work on changing that first.
When you are happy, the things that are important to you begin to change. What you thought matters no longer seems so important. Then you can start taking action, towards living your dream life. What ever that may look like to you. The greatest bit of advice I can offer you when it comes to “dream life” is to really examine your dream life. What does it look like? How does it feel? Do you feel happy and satisfied in this dream life? Is it the dream life you want? or the dream life you think you should have because society has taught you what the dream life looks like?
Therefore, I advise you, really getting to know yourself first. Learn to love yourself, be strong and confident in who you are as a person. From doing this you will learn what your dream life really looks like and will confidently move towards living that dream life. Your true dream life.
How many people would you chat in a day that get inspired by self-love?
I am proud to say that most people I interact with are confidently working towards their own personal goals. I love the fact more and more people are looking for answers and are no longer just accepting facts as final.
What sort of people do you surround yourself with to enhance your self-love regime?
Happy, positive optimistic people are my go-to people. That is not to say there is never any negative talk. We are all human and have a down day occasionally. My friends and I always come from a place of love and genuinely want the best for each other. We are each other’s biggest cheerleaders and are always honest with each other.
Do you have a morning routine to set you for the day?
Yes, I have what I call my bliss hour. It’s my me time. I do this every day without fail.
Before I even get out of bed, I do 20 minutes of positive affirmations. I do this drinking my morning coffee. Whilst looking at myself in my mirror that’s at the end of my bed. Then I write in my journal 3 things that I am grateful for and 3 things that could happen which would make my day great. I then write one positive affirmation in my journal. After that I then do a quick mediation and little bit of self-hypnosis for what I want to work on. I:e confidence.
Once I have done all of this, I then give my day to others. The bliss hour is just for me and It sets me up for the day ahead. I don’t mind what happens in the day as I feel great. I prioritised myself so don’t get annoyed e.t.c as the day progresses and other people / situations make demands of my time.
What’s your go-to way of winding down after a long day?
I love to read or just binge watch a series on Netflix. Quite often after I have written the 3 great things that happened in my day my journal, I will mediate for 10 mins before bed. I find it great for relaxing and clearing away anything negative that may have happened in the day.
What is the one word that you want people to associate you with?
What are the challenges you face in your profession
Getting seen is a hard one. Unless you are big company with a big budget for advertising it can be hard to become known. That’s the main one for me.
How do you contribute towards the society/community?
I donate to various charity’s and will often not charge for my services. I am here to help people and if finances are a problem to my client getting the help and support, they need to take control of their life I will help them for free or what they can afford to pay. I am a big believer in paying things forwards and what goes around comes around.
If you were not a self-love healer, what would you be doing?
I always wanted to be a teacher and, in a way, I guess that is what I have ended up doing. Teaching people how to love themselves. Heal themselves and become the person that they have always wanted to be.
How can people contact you?
Facebook: spiritual essence.